Men's Articles

7 Signs He's Mr. Wrong

Thinking of sealing the deal on a sweetie? Amy tells you why cute and hot should only be a bonus. Love or lust can put blinders on a girl's eyes and plugs in her ears. You see or hear no evil about the man who's got you mesmerised. As for his few shortcomings, you gloss over them with the universal equaliser known as "Nobody's perfect".

True; after all, neither are you. While many things are forgivable (leaving the toothpaste cap off, bad taste in movies, a strange laugh), there are relationship non-negotiables on which you should stand firm. He's definitely a "Don't" if he ...

He Is Taken

The unspoken sisterhood code that binds all women dictate that, if you know he's with someone, steer clear of him. Men who make advances on other women while they're with someone else obviously have trouble staying faithful. If they can betray their partner by making a play for you, there's no reason why they can't do it to you in the future. If he's serious about you, let him come to you free of romantic attachments.

He Doesn't Care About Your Sexual Fulfillment

Mia, 27, had been in a relationship that often made her wonder why sex was a big deal. "I didn't know what the fuss was all about," she says, "because I hadn't experienced the fuss. With my ex, it was all about him, and until I moved on, I didn't know I was missing out big time." He has needs and so do you. But a man who works for his own pleasure and leaves you to fend for yourself has a personality sore spot that goes beyond the bedroom. He's selfish and self-indulgent- not the type who'll make good as a lover, friend, or father. Next!

He Wants To Change You Into Someone You're Not

If he's making demands for you to be someone you weren't when you two met, try to think if he likes you for who you are or if he's trying to mould you into someone else. After years of being told she was "as big as a tub", Jane, 26, finally realised her boyfriend's put-downs chipped away at her self-esteem. She gave him the boot. "When I was free at last, I married someone who thought I was sexy," she says .

He Has Dependency Problems

Although you may not have articulated it well in your youth, you know that what you've always wanted is a man who is responsible for himself, someone who isn't being pushed and shoved toward impending ruin by forces beyond his control. Everyone knows the fatal effects of substance abuse or gambling. If he's addicted to either, walk away from this one.

He Is A Liar

If you know he's a liar, he could lie about everything from what he had for dinner, to his mother's health, or about his fidelity to you. While making little white lies to spare people pain is part of human nature, pathologically covering up the truth or letting slip only a wee part of it are not noble qualities in a man. "He lied all the time to save his a and I knew that," says club promoter Dana, 24, of her ex. "He told me he loved me, but then would go on a diving trip leaving me alone on my birthday. Later on I discovered he liked being with me just so he could enter clubs for free."

He Is A Freeloader

Shelley, 36, thought Martin, 24, was perfect-even if she paid for all their dates. She also gave him a mobile phone, keys to her flat, and an allowance. A spat over money sent Martin running back to his ex-girlfriend. Freeloading is larger than the money issue it appears to be. If he's getting a free ride off you, how can you be sure he's really into you? Before he milks you dry, find someone who has what you have or isn't filching off your plate.

He Just Doesn't Feel Right

He may be a looker on paper, be sweet as sugar, and may even be your biggest fan. But if no sparks fly, don't force the issue. "Gil and I both looked perfect together," shares Cynthia, 30. "When he proposed, I knew we'd have the big house and the cushy lifestyle." But something was missing: soulful conversations. She broke off the engagement, and eventually met a man who shared her love for books and travel. Sooner or later, a relationship built on superficial attraction (great job, great face, great body) rather than on deeper feelings, will crumble under the weight of your heart's inner yearnings.

 

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